your (not) fave ceo of a medicore tumblr blog
incest shippers, terfs, queer exclusionists/phobes, and general gross people dni and block me
here’s some tags I have organized (I use ‘tw x’ for triggers), I have a bunch of untagged queue posts
I have and forever will post whatever I want all the time <33
went to no bitches island and you were there
why were you at no bitches island 🤨
uh,…. um…………….
Going feral thinking about how we have to pay for the privilege to NOT have to listen to nonstop sales pitches.
"What would your ancestors think of your whole gender thing-" What would YOURS think of being told to buy things every two minutes. I think they would kill CEOs in the streets for being annoying. They were known to do that.
the urge to bite while feeling overwhelming affection is completely normal. sorry if you don’t experience that but it’s not my business. get help
The kid will cherish this for their whole life. If they remember it.
went to look this tweet up so I could rt it and discovered this is the same dude as the tubthumping tweet masterpiece
King
if you guys thought you had a weird middle school experience my whole grade was convinced I was an actual literal werewolf for 3 years to the point where people were afraid of me so come 8th grade the popular girl had a huge Halloween party on her farm that everyone went to that just happened to coincide with the full moon so I staged a whole elaborate ‘transformation’ at the end of the night and scared the shit out of all of them. I don’t think I’ll ever top that
the prisoner of azkaban had just come out. we were a bunch of bored idiot kids in the boonies. everyone thought they could identify a werewolf and I just happened to have illnesses that often took me out of school around the time of the full moon every month. it didn’t help that I had been the ‘wolf kid’ since elementary. and I’m not saying I didn’t play into it when I found out the rumor — teen wolf (1985) was one of my favorite movies so of course I wanted to pretend I was living it.
but this went on for years. I had kids showing up behind my house on the full moon hoping to catch me changing. people were afraid to invite me to sleepovers. so when I finally got invited to a party, on that full moon no less, I went all out. I waited for the moon to rise. I hid a costume werewolf head and clawed gloves in the woods, snuck out there mid-party while 30-something kids were gathered around a bonfire, changed, ripped my clothes and started howling from the trees. some brave souls started to investigate and that’s when I started to chase them. pandemonium broke out. and oh, did I have the time of my life, because I hated most of these kids. revenge of the nerds, and all that. they’d teased me for years for things I couldn’t help like being sickly or having too much hair on my body.
I made my getaway with a friend at the end, and left the rest to wonder. most of them realized the prank and later laughed it off with me. but there was one kid who, senior year of high school, admitted I intimidated him because he still believed I was a werewolf. I put my arm around his shoulder, told him, “Between you and me, I am,” and gave him a wink. even after graduation, that guy looked at me like I would eat him alive.
I gotta say, there are worse things to be than a teenage werewolf
if y’all want to date anyone 5’4 an under i’m going to need you to recognize that there is effort involved. they need their outside time but you have to be willing to stand around with them too bc you never know what birds of prey are in the area and it is your responsibility as their partner to make sure they don’t get scooped up. like. that is the bare minimum. c’mon
i just woke up from a dream where i was being interrogated by a bunch of people asking me if “furbies are kosher” firstly…. im not jewish. secondly……..what the fuck
please stop sending me asks pertaining to the kosher status of furbies. i really do not know. this was just a manifestation of my subconscious. im assuming that they are not kosher because furbies aren’t even food. but who knows! ask a rabbi, if you must.
Jew here! Furbies are actually worse than unkosher–they are not permissible as food, even for gentiles. This is because the Torah teaches that it is forbidden for any human to eat the meat of an animal that is still alive, and the Furby cannot die.
hi this is the most ominous description of a furby i have ever heard
love doing something I call ‘the big leaf test’ where I put my hand on a leaf and if the leaf is bigger than my hand I go damn that’s crazy
